Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4276
JMC-STL wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 6:54 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 6:00 pm
JMC-STL wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 5:30 pm
Do you offer high colonics at a reduced rate with that thing?
We got some outdated Ex-lax in the hidden storeroom.
I think some of those spoiled bottles of Massengill would do a better job cuttin' through my blockage right now. Be sure they come with applicators.
Calvin has some Scotch Bonnet wings ... a few of them and you can shit through a screen door.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4277
Turk Sanderson wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 6:58 pm
JMC-STL wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 6:54 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 6:00 pm
We got some outdated Ex-lax in the hidden storeroom.
I think some of those spoiled bottles of Massengill would do a better job cuttin' through my blockage right now. Be sure they come with applicators.
Calvin has some Scotch Bonnet wings ... a few of them and you can shit through a screen door.
You need fresh garlic...get some broth boiling...then mash up a bulb of garlic into a paste...turn off the heat and throw in the garlic...let sit and drink when it has cooled down. That will open you up.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4278
CaptSMRT wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 8:38 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 6:58 pm
JMC-STL wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 6:54 pm
I think some of those spoiled bottles of Massengill would do a better job cuttin' through my blockage right now. Be sure they come with applicators.
Calvin has some Scotch Bonnet wings ... a few of them and you can shit through a screen door.
You need fresh garlic...get some broth boiling...then mash up a bulb of garlic into a paste...turn off the heat and throw in the garlic...let sit and drink when it has cooled down. That will open you up.
You forgot the eye-of-newt, and the monkey’s paw.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4279
Turk Sanderson wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 8:51 pm
CaptSMRT wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 8:38 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote: Thu Nov 07, 2019 6:58 pm

Calvin has some Scotch Bonnet wings ... a few of them and you can shit through a screen door.
You need fresh garlic...get some broth boiling...then mash up a bulb of garlic into a paste...turn off the heat and throw in the garlic...let sit and drink when it has cooled down. That will open you up.
You forgot the eye-of-newt, and the monkey’s paw.
Fresh parsley...and oregano would be nice too.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4285
JMC-STL wrote: Tue Nov 12, 2019 10:06 am
CaptSMRT wrote: Mon Nov 11, 2019 10:25 pmDo you think the makers of the Douchebag have considered re-branding due to being associated with bad people?
Why do you ask? Are you planning to use "Douchebag" as your new stage name? You'd probably get a chuckle outta Paul with that one.
Apparently Paul's hobby is going to comedy shows, sitting in the front row, and glaring the whole time...he said he enjoyed the show a lot and can't wait for us to come back.

Aside from you needing to irrigate your colostomy bag, who else is buying douchebags these days? Millennials don't use them...which is probably why they like licking each others asses.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4287
CaptSMRT wrote: Tue Nov 12, 2019 11:14 am
JMC-STL wrote: Tue Nov 12, 2019 10:06 am
CaptSMRT wrote: Mon Nov 11, 2019 10:25 pmDo you think the makers of the Douchebag have considered re-branding due to being associated with bad people?
Why do you ask? Are you planning to use "Douchebag" as your new stage name? You'd probably get a chuckle outta Paul with that one.
Apparently Paul's hobby is going to comedy shows, sitting in the front row, and glaring the whole time...he said he enjoyed the show a lot and can't wait for us to come back.

Aside from you needing to irrigate your colostomy bag, who else is buying douchebags these days? Millennials don't use them...which is probably why they like licking each others asses.
No, they don't like licking each other's asses... it's just that that's their only protein source since they have to pay for the Trump tax cuts.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4289
JMC-STL wrote: Tue Nov 12, 2019 7:58 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote: Tue Nov 12, 2019 6:17 pm
CaptSMRT wrote: Tue Nov 12, 2019 11:14 am... Millennials don't use them...which is probably why they like licking each others asses.
No, they don't like licking each other's asses... it's just that that's their only protein source since they have to pay for the Trump tax cuts.
Always getting your own licks in, eh Rev?
You two need to get out more....millennials eat ass like JMC eats ZOO popcorn, by the heaping handful.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4291
JMC-STL wrote: Wed Nov 13, 2019 7:54 am
CaptSMRT wrote: Wed Nov 13, 2019 6:25 amYou two need to get out more....millennials eat ass like JMC eats ZOO popcorn, by the heaping handful.
Why, I'll have you know ... Mrs. JMC hangs the bucket under my chin, so I can enjoy my popcorn hands-free while she pushes me around that ZOO & I point where I wanna go next.
This is probably closer to the truth than anyone wants to realize.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4292
CaptSMRT wrote: Wed Nov 13, 2019 11:53 am
JMC-STL wrote: Wed Nov 13, 2019 7:54 am
CaptSMRT wrote: Wed Nov 13, 2019 6:25 amYou two need to get out more....millennials eat ass like JMC eats ZOO popcorn, by the heaping handful.
Why, I'll have you know ... Mrs. JMC hangs the bucket under my chin, so I can enjoy my popcorn hands-free while she pushes me around that ZOO & I point where I wanna go next.
This is probably closer to the truth than anyone wants to realize.
I've been told we present a very striking portrait of undying love & marital commitment. But I gave the guy some popcorn before he said it. That makes me a great husband AND a philanthropist.