Blues News Forum

Anyone else get the feeling that Putin got a hard-on when Turkey shot his plane down?

CaptSMRT wrote:Anyone else get the feeling that Putin got a hard-on when Turkey shot his plane down?

I'm just waiting for TASS to release the story about Putin having been piloting the jet, ejecting when he saw the air-to-air missile coming right for him, was able to redirect the missile heading to take out several Turkish ground-based air defense batteries at once, and then caught the jet stream back to Moscow where he floated down into an ice rink & promptly scored a quadruple hat trick. Take THAT, Zydnie Kroshbie!

Putin roasts Turkey for thanksgiving.

I figgered he'd use the deep fryer this year. It'd give a whole new meaning to the term "Turkish baths."

He vows revenge from his throne of skulls.

Every time a murder happens in a shopping frenzy on #BlackFriday, an Angel gets to do a lot of paper work.

Yet owing to their winged accessories, they have plenty of quills to write it all down with. I just hope they know shorthand to keep up.

Though it'd take a lot more Angel Scribes for this scenario ... http://www.theonion.com/article/42-mill ... end--30517

All things being equal, I am not willing to kill you for a 60" 4k TV. I might punch you in the face for the right price.

A boot to the groin would be more likely to make me loosen my grip. Lucky for me, I'm perfectly happy with my 23-inch combo tube TV/VCR/DVD player that's going green around the edges. Right now the only one threatening to punch me is my wife, when she has to raise her left arm to receive Channel 9.1 on the rabbit ears.

You need to enter this century of TV technology.

Yelling "HELP" while "Comfortably Numb" is playing over the stereo only makes your kitchen fire seem more ironic, it sounds too much like "HELLO".

So that's what the "distant ship smoke on the horizon" was all about?

CaptSMRT wrote:You need to enter this century of TV technology.

Funny you should mention that. Those people from something called "Dish Network" keep leaving messages on my tabletop magnetic tape answering machine, but the machine's 20-second record limit cuts them off each time before they can give me a call-back number. And neither my rotary dial kitchen wall phone (hanging over my 35 year-old Amana Radarange) nor my whiz-bang 10-channel, 44 MHz cordless phone have caller ID. So I'm kinda stuck where I'm at.

JMC-STL wrote:

CaptSMRT wrote:You need to enter this century of TV technology.

Funny you should mention that. Those people from something called "Dish Network" keep leaving messages on my tabletop magnetic tape answering machine, but the machine's 20-second record limit cuts them off each time before they can give me a call-back number. And neither my rotary dial kitchen wall phone (hanging over my 35 year-old Amana Radarange) nor my whiz-bang 10-channel, 44 MHz cordless phone have caller ID. So I'm kinda stuck where I'm at.

You need more Hertz.

CaptSMRT wrote:You need more Hertz.

I rent from Avis. They try harder.

I love America so much I gave a gun to an infant.

With certain parents, you may have just done us an award-worthy public service.

JMC-STL wrote:With certain parents, you may have just done us an award-worthy public service.

You would have to give every baby a gun to generate an noticeable effect.

CaptSMRT wrote:

JMC-STL wrote:With certain parents, you may have just done us an award-worthy public service.

You would have to give every baby a gun to generate an noticeable effect.

Well, what're you waitin' for, then?

JMC-STL wrote:

CaptSMRT wrote:

JMC-STL wrote:With certain parents, you may have just done us an award-worthy public service.

You would have to give every baby a gun to generate an noticeable effect.

Well, what're you waitin' for, then?

Obama took my gun...and he gave it to a refugee.

CaptSMRT wrote:

JMC-STL wrote:

CaptSMRT wrote: You would have to give every baby a gun to generate an noticeable effect.

Well, what're you waitin' for, then?

Obama took my gun...and he gave it to a refugee.

Well, that's another solution.

World Aids Day lands on Giving Tuesday. Looks like tomorrow will be heading to the clinic Wednesday.

CaptSMRT wrote:World Aids Day lands on Giving Tuesday. Looks like tomorrow will be heading to the clinic Wednesday.

Too late by then. There is no "Morning After Pill" for HIV.

JMC-STL wrote:

CaptSMRT wrote:World Aids Day lands on Giving Tuesday. Looks like tomorrow will be heading to the clinic Wednesday.

Too late by then. There is no "Morning After Pill" for HIV.

Matthew McConaugHIV would not agree with you.

CaptSMRT wrote:

JMC-STL wrote:

CaptSMRT wrote:World Aids Day lands on Giving Tuesday. Looks like tomorrow will be heading to the clinic Wednesday.

Too late by then. There is no "Morning After Pill" for HIV.

Matthew McConaugHIV would not agree with you.

His movie character's inspiration died from the disease seven years after diagnosis. It was a long Morning After.