Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4201
CaptSMRT wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 4:24 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 3:50 pm
CaptSMRT wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 2:22 pm
I'm fat enough to get called fat my entire life....but not fat enough to have a sense of humor about it.
In Illinois you're not fat unless your shadow has a shadow.
I am not get my own cable show fat. I am could have a heart attack from the stress of waking up fat.
Shit... you ain't fucked-up enough to make fun of yourself...you don't even have a syndrome named after you yet.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4204
Turk Sanderson wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 8:21 pm
JMC-STL wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 8:13 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 5:40 pm
Shit... you ain't fucked-up enough to make fun of yourself...you don't even have a syndrome named after you yet.
Elizabeth Smart had Stockholm Syndrome. Maybe Captain Smart has Jacksonville Syndrome.
Is that what they call getting tarred and feathered these days?
The Cap'n's downfall in Jacksonville appears to have been a simple mistake in choosing a venue. I'll bet his comedy would've been received more enthusiastically at The Illinois School for the Deaf.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4205
JMC-STL wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 9:39 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 8:21 pm
JMC-STL wrote:
Sun Oct 13, 2019 8:13 pm

Elizabeth Smart had Stockholm Syndrome. Maybe Captain Smart has Jacksonville Syndrome.
Is that what they call getting tarred and feathered these days?
The Cap'n's downfall in Jacksonville appears to have been a simple mistake in choosing a venue. I'll bet his comedy would've been received more enthusiastically at The Illinois School for the Deaf.
The crowd wasn't bad....and I got paid $65.
Attachments
jacksonville.jpg

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4208
When I was a kid I was bullied a lot. One time after taking a particularly bad beating my dad said....why dont you invite them over for pizza
I'm like...so they have more energy to beat me? Why don't I buy them ice cream after they kick my ass again. Why dont I buy them karate lessons too?
My favorite thing people would say....bullies are more afraid you which is why they bully. Beating the shit out of me was just their way of expressing fear.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4209
CaptSMRT wrote:
Tue Oct 15, 2019 3:58 pm
When I was a kid I was bullied a lot. One time after taking a particularly bad beating my dad said....why dont you invite them over for pizza
I'm like...so they have more energy to beat me? Why don't I buy them ice cream after they kick my ass again. Why dont I buy them karate lessons too?
My favorite thing people would say....bullies are more afraid you which is why they bully. Beating the shit out of me was just their way of expressing fear.
You were born too soon... today you could have pulled out your hog-leg and dropped that bastard graveyard dead. Couple of years in the big house, and your back on the stage with a whole bunch of new material.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4210
Turk Sanderson wrote:
Tue Oct 15, 2019 5:05 pm
CaptSMRT wrote:
Tue Oct 15, 2019 3:58 pm
When I was a kid I was bullied a lot. One time after taking a particularly bad beating my dad said....why dont you invite them over for pizza
I'm like...so they have more energy to beat me? Why don't I buy them ice cream after they kick my ass again. Why dont I buy them karate lessons too?
My favorite thing people would say....bullies are more afraid you which is why they bully. Beating the shit out of me was just their way of expressing fear.
You were born too soon... today you could have pulled out your hog-leg and dropped that bastard graveyard dead. Couple of years in the big house, and your back on the stage with a whole bunch of new material.
No shit...a guy I went to grade school with was shot in front of his four kids by two road ragers yesterday.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4212
JMC-STL wrote:
Tue Oct 15, 2019 9:22 pm
CaptSMRT wrote:
Tue Oct 15, 2019 7:59 pm
No shit...a guy I went to grade school with was shot in front of his four kids by two road ragers yesterday.
Saw that story, very sad. The Rev needs to start issuing discount certificates for anger management classes. Hot wings included - those always bring out the best in people.

ETA: The suspects look hungry ...


Suspects.JPG
He said one of the bullets hit his chest and bounced off...talk about your miracles.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4216
I asked a drug addict how they could tell the difference between heroin and fentanyl. He goes..."I can tell because I take crack and turn it back into cocaine."
I'm like...what the fuck does that have to do with my question. That is like a butcher telling you they turn ham back into pigs and that's how he knows this turkey is fresh.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

#4220
Turk Sanderson wrote:
Fri Oct 18, 2019 8:00 pm
CaptSMRT wrote:
Fri Oct 18, 2019 5:52 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote:
Fri Oct 18, 2019 5:20 pm
I was shopping on ebay, and I saw an action camera that was only $1.30. I almost bought it, but i stopped myself when I realized that it was in England.
Why would you turn crack back into cocaine?
There's whores down on the stroll who turn crack into coke all the time.
Good point