Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4476
Turk Sanderson wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 7:18 pm
CaptSMRT wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 6:17 pm I had a woman tell me she thinks it's sexy when a man makes noises when they have sex...I said Trump needs to make ISIS pay for 9/11 and stuck my finger in her ass.
So the sound of sweaty pancakes wasn't getting it for her, huh?
The Sound of Sweaty Pancakes is my favorite Simon and Garfunkel song.

It isn't nihilism to say life is finite. I'm 45 ..approaching 400lbs...my window of mortality is winking closed...like Popeye's good eye. I took a shit in a house plant today and wiped with a leaf... let me tell you..Charmin could learn something from a fern.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4477
CaptSMRT wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 9:51 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 7:18 pm
CaptSMRT wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 6:17 pm I had a woman tell me she thinks it's sexy when a man makes noises when they have sex...I said Trump needs to make ISIS pay for 9/11 and stuck my finger in her ass.
So the sound of sweaty pancakes wasn't getting it for her, huh?
The Sound of Sweaty Pancakes is my favorite Simon and Garfunkel song.

It isn't nihilism to say life is finite. I'm 45 ..approaching 400lbs...my window of mortality is winking closed...like Popeye's good eye. I took a shit in a house plant today and wiped with a leaf... let me tell you..Charmin could learn something from a fern.
You should do your family a favor, and go ahead and book your funeral at today's rate... after 400 lbs, prices practically double.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4478
Turk Sanderson wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 10:46 pm
CaptSMRT wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 9:51 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 7:18 pm

So the sound of sweaty pancakes wasn't getting it for her, huh?
The Sound of Sweaty Pancakes is my favorite Simon and Garfunkel song.

It isn't nihilism to say life is finite. I'm 45 ..approaching 400lbs...my window of mortality is winking closed...like Popeye's good eye. I took a shit in a house plant today and wiped with a leaf... let me tell you..Charmin could learn something from a fern.
You should do your family a favor, and go ahead and book your funeral at today's rate... after 400 lbs, prices practically double.
I'm a light 400.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4481
CaptSMRT wrote: Sat Jan 18, 2020 9:18 am
JMC-STL wrote: Sat Jan 18, 2020 6:38 am
CaptSMRT wrote: Fri Jan 17, 2020 11:28 pmI'm a light 400.
You're also a young terminal. Skip a gig or 3 and get help. We'll all be happier.
You could skip waking up tomorrow and nobody would notice.
Mrs. JMC would, when it came time for her to make the bed. She'd have to move the body somewhere to get it outta the way. But thanks for your concern.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4482
JMC-STL wrote: Sat Jan 18, 2020 2:39 pm
CaptSMRT wrote: Sat Jan 18, 2020 9:18 am
JMC-STL wrote: Sat Jan 18, 2020 6:38 am
You're also a young terminal. Skip a gig or 3 and get help. We'll all be happier.
You could skip waking up tomorrow and nobody would notice.
Mrs. JMC would, when it came time for her to make the bed. She'd have to move the body somewhere to get it outta the way. But thanks for your concern.
She can throw you in the compost heap with the rest of the dog shit.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4483
JMC-STL wrote: Sat Jan 18, 2020 2:39 pm
CaptSMRT wrote: Sat Jan 18, 2020 9:18 am
JMC-STL wrote: Sat Jan 18, 2020 6:38 am
You're also a young terminal. Skip a gig or 3 and get help. We'll all be happier.
You could skip waking up tomorrow and nobody would notice.
Mrs. JMC would, when it came time for her to make the bed. She'd have to move the body somewhere to get it outta the way. But thanks for your concern.
She can throw you in the compost heap with the rest of the dog shit.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4493
JMC-STL wrote: Tue Jan 28, 2020 7:42 am @Cap'n: Seems you have recurring symptoms of Posting Gonorrhea. Maybe The Rev can give you a certificate to clear that up. With an order of his new spicy fried pickles appetizer.
Turk can't cure STDs... but The Burning Bush did tell me that there's a cure for the hair loss, which the Capt'n has been known to gripe about from time to time. He was laughing as it said it, so I'm not sure if I believe him...he does have a weird sense of humor sometimes.

Re: How many Blues fans does it take?

4498
JMC-STL wrote: Thu Jan 30, 2020 1:02 pm
Turk Sanderson wrote: Wed Jan 29, 2020 4:58 pm
CaptSMRT wrote: Wed Jan 29, 2020 2:54 pmWhy am I only now figuring out that the true host represents Christ's jizz? Its salty, white, some old dude puts it on your tongue.
I've been warning you for years about those Catholics.... if you are still eating their hosts, that's on you.
You two are making it VERY difficult for me to share God's forgiveness with you.
Jesus made water into wine...the bible doesn't go into the specifics on where it came from. I like to think it shot out of his wrists like Spider-man because the alternative is kind of gross.